How to teach your kid online safety basics: pop-ups, private info and family rules

Even a 6-year-old playing a game on a tablet can run into a pop-up that says "You won a prize! Click here!" or a message from someone they don't know. The single most important online safety skill at this age is simple: stop, don't click, and tell a grown-up.

Talking comes first

The Federal Trade Commission puts it plainly: talking with your kids about your family's rules and expectations is key to helping them build good online habits. Parental controls help, the FTC says, but they work alongside conversation, not instead of it.

The American Academy of Pediatrics suggests setting parental controls and privacy settings at the most secure level when a child starts a new account, and talking about who kids can chat with.

What schools aim for. The Computer Science Teachers Association's standards for kindergarten through second grade include keeping login information private and working respectfully and responsibly with others online.

Skill 1: Tell a grown-up about pop-ups or strange messages

1. Spot a pop-up or a message that seems odd.
2. Don't click anything in it, not even the X if you're not sure.
3. Show a grown-up right away.
4. Telling was the right thing to do.

What "odd" looks like to a kid:

• "You won!" or "Free coins!" messages
• A warning that the device has a virus
• A message from someone they don't know
• Anything asking for a name, address, password or photo
• Anything that makes them feel scared, confused or uncomfortable

Step 4 is for parents, too. Thank them every time they tell you, even if it turns out to be nothing. If kids get in trouble for telling ("Why were you on that site?"), they stop telling. The goal is a child who comes to you first.

Practice with pretend pop-ups. Draw one on paper and act it out: "What do you do?" Kids love catching the "trick."

Skill 2: Know which info stays private

1. Private: full name, address, school, passwords.
2. Ask a grown-up before sharing anything online.
3. Say them in person, never in a voice note.
4. Name one thing that's OK to share, like a favorite color or animal.

A simple rule for this age: if it could help a stranger find you, it stays private. Your address, your school, your full name, where you'll be tomorrow, photos showing your house or school.

Passwords are private too, except from your grown-up. Even best friends don't get them.

The challenge: explain the family's online rules

The mastery goal is to explain the family's online safety rules to a parent, including why each rule exists.

1. Read the family's online rules together.
2. Think of a reason for each rule.
3. Explain every rule to your grown-up.
4. Ask about any rule you're not sure of.

Don't have written rules yet? Make them together. Keep it to five or six short rules a 6-year-old can remember, like:

• I only use apps and sites my grown-up has said OK to.
• I tell a grown-up if anything online feels strange or scary.
• I don't share my name, address, school or passwords.
• I don't talk to strangers online.
• I use devices where grown-ups can see.

The "why" is what makes rules stick. A child who understands why we keep our address private is safer than one who just memorized a rule.

Make it a quest

In Family Quests, this is the Safe Clicker skill. Practice quests are tell a grown-up about pop-ups or strange messages and know which info stays private, and the mastery quest is explain the family's online safety rules to a parent. The private-info quest is done in person and confirmed with a tap only, so no personal details ever go into the app. Kids in Family Quests never have their own email, password or account. Start free.

Next: teach your kid typing and searching, or go back to healthy device habits.